At last the juiciest bits are upon us. Debates! The brawls of brains! The best chance for all to find out where candidates stand on the tough issues, how they act under fire, under pressure, in a challenging format. Let the respective cheerleaders for both parties gather round the tube hooting and jeering their favored and hated ones, while the undecided shush them and listen attentively, making mental notes all the while. You want democracy? This is democracy American-style, two lone gunmen both trying to be the last one standing. Finally.

Sure, recent debates haven’t been all that exciting, or enlightening. The biggest thing to come out of the 2000 round was Al Gore’s sighs, and a bewildering array of ways to fit compassion and lockboxes into answers. Those events felt more like prolonged PR infomercials than exchanges of ideas. But isn’t that just politics? And every debate still has the potential to turn intense and meaningful, right?

Well, yes and no. Yes, it’s politics, but no, don’t expect to learn much beyond sound bites. The truth is debates these days are more scripted than your average WCW match. The outcome may not be decided, but everything else is.

Back only a decade and a half ago, all presidential debates were controlled and sponsored by The League of Women Voters, a non-partisan group that routinely tortured candidates with difficult questions and uncompromising rules. In 1984 Ronald Reagan and Walter Mondale were so scared of what might happen, they vetoed 68 proposed panelists, trying to avoid uncomfortable questions. The League called a press conference to vehemently chastise the candidates; the next debate, the League got their favored moderators.

If you’re over 30, you may remember a time when candidates faced a whole host of journalists at any one event. Anyone from the roundtable could ask a question; if an answer was evasive, they could follow-up or call the candidate on it and force a more direct response. If the candidate was at a loss, he might be up there for 4 and a half minutes looking foolish.

That changed in 1988. Two years prior the heads of the Democratic and Republican National Committees, Paul Kirk and Frank Fahrenkopf, formed the Commission of Presidential Debates (CPD). The two men resigned their posts and became co-chairmen of the CPD. What had become a non-partisan process became bi-partisan. A trivial change? Hardly.

For those 1988 debates the elder Bush and Michael Dukakis negotiated terms for their debates, and handed it to the League of Women Voters. The League called their rules a sham and refused to have anything to do with them – at which point the CPD stepped in and gladly filled the void.

Since that time all debate formats have been decided upon by the candidates themselves, through negotiators under the protective guise of the bi-partisan CPD. And as you might imagine, the format has wound up quite watered down. The debates are now so banal that critics complain they are little more than glorified joint news conferences.

One glaring difference is third party candidates are cut out. While they are rarely a true contender themselves, an independent will affect the outcome of elections fairly often: see Perot, Ross, 1992 or Nader, Ralph, 2000. While the party it favors may vary by election, it is in the general interest of the two majors to keep the playing field to themselves.

There are also plenty of overt and covert differences in the makeup of the debates formats. Instead of panels, the candidates are questioned by a single moderator chosen by their negotiating teams – someone likely to throw softballs their way. Follow-up questions are long gone, meaning the candidates only have to worry about memorizing prepared answers to questions they already know the basic shape of (since they are also decided beforehand).

Oh by the way, the definition of a debate – a discussion or argument between two or more sides – that’s gone too. Neither candidate is allowed to address the other. After one candidate responds to a question (in a short 2 minute time limit) the other can talk about the answer for up to a minute and a half in certain circumstances. Usually, though, most of that time is spent answering the question themselves, not responding to something their opponent has said.

In Town Hall debates – with audience participation – in the past the parties have had all questions vetted by the moderator before they could be asked. The audience itself is very carefully selected – picture a high-priced lawyer culling a jury, and you get the idea.

But the level of control goes much deeper than that. The date is chosen by the candidates – in 1996 Clinton decided to have the debates during the World Series; he had a large lead and thus wanted low viewership. Dole agreed in exchange for cutting Perot out of the process, fearful he would siphon more Republican votes than Democrat.

The political parties also choose the location. Again in ’96 the candidates chose cities not recommended by the CPD, which rubber-stamped the process anyway.

The candidates agree to attire beforehand. Even camera angles – something Gore’s team didn’t correctly prepare for in his debates. His famous sighs occurred when a split-screen showing reactions was allowed. In the other debates that year only the candidate speaking could be shown – and according to those who were there, Bush would have looked just as bad had he been televised responding to Gore in those debates. But W. was smart enough to keep such things off the screens.

If you’re team is well prepared you should never have such a gaffe. Your candidate should never need to look as nervous and shifty as Tricky Dick did contrasted with JFK in the first televised debate. Indeed, control is pervasive enough that the debates are mostly about which side can put on a better show. The toughest issues are often avoided, and policy talk rarely sets the tone of the debate. It is which candidate stays on message best while looking most Presidential and most likable.

All this can be done because the CPD provides a neutral cover behind which candidates can hide their back-room dealings (until this year, their Memoranda of Understanding concerning debates were never released to the public). If the two sides openly hosted their own debates than they’d need to worry about appearing fair and democratic - not so when the bi-partisan CPD let’s the negotiators use their office space to hammer out deals.

The general public may not be fully aware of the exclusive nature and selective processes used to make up debates these days, but they are responding to it. Despite a substantial increase in the U.S. population, the number of people watching Presidential duels has dropped over 26 million from 1992-2000. Is this really all the CPD’s fault? Perhaps not, but the fact it has occurred on their watch while they have been taming the nature of these debates is certainly suggestive.

Walter Cronkite has been quoted calling the CPD debates an “unconscionable fraud” that is “sabotaging the democratic process.” Others are less kind. They note the CPD is a tax-exempt organization, yet it breaks many laws set to govern such entities. Corporations basically sponsor the debates, sometimes with free beer being passed out as lobbyists argue for alcohol-friendly legislation and other such shenanigans. That sort of thing is supposed to be kept far from allegedly neutral commissions like the CPD.

A number of non-partisan groups are banding together trying to educate the public about the highly partisan nature of Presidential debates today, and they seem to be making progress. For instance, Open Debates (opendebates.com) believes it was through their pressure that this year’s Memorandum of Understanding was published. Still, expect change to be slow.

Does this mean you should turn off the TV when the debates come on? Of course not. We trust you to be media-savvy and to handle yourself well in the face of biases. Most people can watch QVC without buying every third item.

Watch the debates, but remember: You aren’t really being presented with the issues, you are being sold an image. Watch, just don’t buy cheap.